Photo by Tim De Pauw on Unsplash
“The violence of positivity does not deprive, it saturates; does not exclude, exhausts.” ― Byung-Chul Han, The Burnout Society
Have you ever had that feeling that even after a long night's sleep, you woke up even more tired? Or that, even with a weekend without work, you start Monday wanting a few more days to relax? You are not alone.
The subtle and profound transformations of work in recent decades are many, but two can be highlighted: the shift from physical work to mental and relational work and the exponential increase in interactions through social media. Along with that, the positivity industry that, on the one hand, encourages us to explore our full potential, is also the same one that makes us constantly feel inadequate and forced to work until exhaustion to prove to society our own worth.
The work that used to be mostly manual and generated physical fatigue, now generates other types of fatigue. This does not mean that it is not important to rest physically, which remains essential. A good night's sleep, with good mattresses and pillows, a nap after lunch or even active forms such as stretching and massages can go down very well. More than that, the sleep-food-exercise triad remains basic for anyone who wants to reach the highest level of disposition that the body is capable of providing.
But, in a world where more and more people spend the day sitting in front of a screen, it can tire us in imperceptible ways. Now, we need to rest in other ways:
Mental Resting: the amount of decisions made per day, from the color of a chart to the budget of an entire company or the level of concentration for long hours, can generate such a great mental overload that it is not uncommon to see it causing insomnia or anxiety. The mind just cannot relax. For this, some activities can help:
Jot down thoughts, tasks or ideas in a notebook before bed.
Take short breaks between appointments. Scheduling meetings for 45 minutes instead of 1 hour can go a long way.
Laugh. From anything you think is funny. Always having a good meme site on hand helps a lot.
Emotional Resting: Saying yes to everything, accepting tasks or situations that hurt your values, or overloading yourself with unnecessary situations just to try to prove your usefulness are common situations for those who are emotionally exhausted. Before reaching extreme levels like burnout or depression (which require specialist and professional care), you can try a few things:
Chat without a pre-set agenda. Often, we just need to make room to welcome those emotions. This can be done with colleagues or with friends, depending on the context.
Observe your breathing. Entering a meditative state is a tool available to any human being and capable of generating a type of rest that is only possible when we observe our emotions looking at them from the outside.
Music. It can be the song that makes you cry and put it out or the one that inspires you to transcend a difficult situation.
Social Resting: research says that we are made to interact with no more than 150 people. In a virtual environment with thousands of connections on social media, this number is a joke. Frequent interactions, even if subtle (seeing the stories of someone you barely know), are capable of draining us deeply. Whether due to the tireless desire we have to compare ourselves with other people or the constant need to please everyone, socialization, even for the most extroverted people, needs to be taken care of. For this, social rest can happen in a few ways:
Interact face-to-face with people you trust a lot. There is not always a need to isolate yourself, but to be in an invigorating social environment.
Cameraless meetings. Of course, the webcam on allows us to create a greater sense of closeness in virtual work, but have you ever stopped to think that this is not always necessary? Sometimes just voice calls are enough for some subjects. It may seem simple, but it allows us to be more relaxed.
Temporarily delete social media apps. You have no idea what a week without Instagram can do for you.
Sensorial Resting: If you've read or watched Harry Potter, you'll understand that screens (cell phone, computer, tablet, etc.) are like dementors. Just by being close, they are able to suck our vital energy and demand a very high level of attention. Of course, screens are useful - you're looking at one right now - but it's all too easy to get lost in a never-ending tangle of information. In addition, screens are today the main tool for consuming entertainment, making us hostage in productive hours or not. These habits generate sensory fatigue and an addiction to mental stimuli. To take care of this, you can try:
Electronic disconnection. Spending an entire day without screens can be a lot more invigorating than you think.
Do not use your cell phone immediately after waking up. Or will you say you don't see notifications before you even get out of bed?
Accept boredom. Doing literally nothing can be very difficult even for 5 minutes, but it's one of the most effective ways to get sensory rest.
Possibly there are other types of rest and it is worth, little by little, to investigate what are the best ways to re-energize yourself. It is also important to note that sometimes no rest will make you work better in an organizational culture with which you do not identify. Above all, it is important to always ask yourself if self-love is up to date.
"A healthy body, a calm mind and a house full of love cannot be bought, they must be earned." - Naval Ravikant
One of the types of rest that could be explained here is spiritual rest. It's a long subject, but, in summary, it's about seeking to reconnect with something bigger than yourself and questioning yourself about what the world is asking of you. If you want to know more about it, leave a comment or send a message and we'll talk.
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